Jan 10th, 2006

So this is the New Year…

Happy New Year, good friends! I must apologize to you all for my long absence. The holidays and all, you know. Anyways, I will begin by telling you about Christmas. This was the first year of my life to have not spent Christmas with my parents. This was not a sad thing, but rather just weird. It was one of the realities of adulthood that I have had to learn this year. This year, I worked all day long on the 23rd. On Saturday the 24th, Meg and I made the trip up to Jacksonville to stay with her family. On the way we got to drop by the Chamblin’s Book Mine, which is perhaps the coolest and largest used bookstore I have ever been to. I picked up some books as gifts for people and then bought something for myself that I have wanted for the last decade. Since I first started taking debate classes in high school, I have wanted a Bartlett’s Anthology of Familiar Quotations. However, as a new one normally goes for about $75, I have never purchased one. That is, until Christmas Eve. I will be filling the pages of my journal with quotes in the coming weeks and months so I will not waste your time in telling you how amazing it is. Just trust me. After some more shopping Meg and I made it to her parent place where we enjoyed a great Christmas Eve, and a wonderful Christmas Day. As far as gifts go, this year was fantastic. I got an Ipod video from my parents. I got new Reef’s from Meg’s parents. Meg got me a new watch, new clothes, and Sufjan Stevens Illinois on Vinyl. I know, I know, gifts aren’t the important thing. However, I would be lying if I told you that I did not really enjoy them. I think the best part of Christmas, though, was the day after when Meg and I drove to Orlando to spend the day with the Kerstsens, My Parents, and Meg, Tru, and Scotty. It was a great day.
The following week was full of really busy days at work, Kathy and Todd’s wedding on Thursday, and excitement over Miami’s bowl game. Everything went well with exception of the Miami game. I never would have imagined I would see the Hurricanes lose that badly. Anyways, it was not all that big of a deal because we got to play some late night ultimate Frisbee and all was well in the world. The following night, as nobody had any really big plans for New Year’s we all went over to Devan’s and had a blast. We played outburst, we watched the ball drop, and we made smores. All in all, it was a good night.
Although, I must say that the idea of a New Year becomes less and less exciting as I get older. You can make as many resolutions as you want, or reflect on the year past, but either way there is no stopping. Life just keeps on moving. A New Year makes us feel like one thing came to an end and another thing completely new has started. However, this is not entirely true. Anyways, I have been really excited about is all the cool things I have to look forward to this year. It is going to be a good year. The first thing that I was looking forward to this year was the Passion Conference in Nashville. It was fantastic. Glorious is the only word that can truly describe it. There is a basic theme that we were supposed to come away from the conference with, but the reality is that God spoke to me in a different way while I was there. Normally, I go to these conferences to get into the worship or here a couple people speak that I really enjoy. This year, however, God used the time that I spend by myself to really speak to me. The ultimate point is found in Romans 14, a verse I have been looking at the wrong way for sometime now. My life is not my own, and it needs to be used for God’s glory. So, when the verse talks about not causing another to stumble, it means placing the needs of others ahead of myself. I have been guilty in the last few months of being very selfish. I have lived the life that I wanted to live without much thought as to how it affected others. This was wrong, and to anyone who has noticed this, I apologize. The truth of the matter is that I worship a big God. The creator of the Heavens who still finds it possible to love me in spite of myself would not treat others this way. Also, Louie Giglio gave a talk the last day we were there that really inspired me. It talked about the idea that God gave us each the passions we have for a specific reason. We are called into full-time ministry. However, that does not mean going to be a missionary or a pastor, at least not for most people. God calls us to strive to be the very best at whatever we are passionate about so that He would be glorified through it. This thought led me to think about what I am passionate about. It has been a thought I have been dealing with ever since. The bottom line is that I love music, I love the arts, I love college football, I love ultimate Frisbee, I love deep conversations, I love good food, I love sleep, I love Meg, I love my family. However, while there are many things that I love, the truth is that people are my passion. I love people. I love being around people. I love getting to know people. So then, what should I do with my life, if my passion is found in every corner of the Earth? My passion is everywhere. So what do I do with it?
I think it all starts in a simple way. God has really been moving me to see people through His eyes. He wants me to see that people are worth sending His Son to die for, and not just what they do, what they make, or what they are wearing. I can’t explain how exactly this is all happening, but my heart is growing more sensitive to these things.
Last, but not least, the guys had our first bible study of the semester. We are studying John for the spring and into the summer. Last night, as we dug deep into John 1, the thing that God has really been revealing to me came through so perfectly clear. Nathanael is told about Jesus and wants to see for himself who this man really is. As Nathanael approaches Jesus for the first time, Jesus tells him things about who Nathanael is and where he was last hanging out. To this, Nathanael responds that Jesus is surely the Son of God and King of Israel. Jesus then tells Nathanael that his faith, more or less, is cheap. Basically, He is telling Nathanael that if he is willing to believe because Jesus just told him about where he was sitting, then he has not even seen the tip of the iceberg. He is going to see miracles. He is going to see angels. He is going to see God. The thing that I so love about this passage is that it talks about human faith. My faith is so small. How do I know that? Well, because my surrender is small. You see, your surrender is directly proportionate to your faith. If I say that I believe Jesus is the Son of God and the victor over death and sin, but then I don’t live like that is true, it is because the faith in me is small. I believe it, but it hasn’t really gripped me in a life-changing way. This is where the maturity comes in. My faith has to mature. My faith has to be real in a way that shows the world that I really believe what I am saying. I have failed at this. I don’t want to anymore. So, if there is any new year’s resolution for me, it would be to have a big faith, because I believe in a HUGE God.

Happy New Year’s, All!

Yours,
Rob


p.s. I will leave you with some of the lyrics to an appropriate Death Cab For Cutie song.

“So this is the new year
And I have no resolutions
Or self assigned penance
For problems with easy solutions”